Jamaica Run By Old White People?

It may seem the case seeing that the Jamaican Regulators (sounds like a hockey team) are banning all explicit forms of sex and violence from the airwaves.

More importantly, it is targeted against "daggering". If you don't know what daggering is, well it's like dry hump dancing but more-so than what our club hoes do.

Hit the Jump for a prime example of the aptly titled "Daggering" by Mr.Vegas

Now, I always viewed the Jamaicans (albeit, stereotypically)as laid back and chilled as a mu'fucka. But, I guess I was wrong. They are attacking music talking about sex,rape, arson, murder. Well, god dammit, what the hell are artists SUPPOSED to talk about? Holding Hands? Love? Baking Cakes?

Nah, mon! It's all about Daggering.

Jump to 1:23 to see just how great this shit is.


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Nude Photo of Madonna Sells for 37,500 Dollars, Somehow this is News (NSFW!!!)

Look, we're sucking you in with a 5 year old picture! And now we're keeping you here! Woohoo! Our first NSFW post! And by Not Safe for Work, we mean home, office, playground, motor vehicle, or any other place that puts you in a position to commit either suicide or homicide. Or both. So don't click the hyper unless you want the bodies to start piling up. The sweaty, naked bodies.

I TOLD YOU. A nude photo of pop singer Madonna was sold at Christie's Auction House for 37,500 dollars this past week. The singer, who is known to make shitty movies and bang married, disgraced latino baseball stars, took the picture in 1979. The winning bidder, on the other hand, is obviously blind, or using this picture to test the threshold of human will needed to keep from tearing one's eyes out. Or maybe he thought it was a picture of the Virgin Mary naked. I don't know how these things work, I'm NOT CATHOLIC. But I know some of you sick bastards are.

Either way, didn't this guy realize that a naked picture of Madonna is about as common as a stripper with a c-section? Seriously, I just posted the picture below and literally saved myself and all of you 37,500 dollars. But I suppose you did pay for it with mental scars. Sorry, I'm gonna have to go Chinese Dollar Store on you and say "No Refunds" on mental scarring.
Just in case you were wondering, here's a video for an effective cure to unseeing things.


While we're on the subject, I'd like to let all of you know that I also sell naked photos of myself, . Well, it's more like I take a bunch of pictures of my wang and toss them at women from the bed of a pickup truck, but they still have a lot of uses. You can put one in a field to scare the birds away, or put it on your lawn to scare squirrels away, or threaten your boyfriend to use it instead of him, or measure VERY large things with it. I print them 1:1 scale, so I have to use a posterboard. Or three.

UPDATE: These things are selling like hotcakes. Someone get the ShamWow guy on the phone! Stat!

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Stevie Wonder performs with the Jonas Brothers?

I thought Stevie was blind, not deaf? What the hell man?

He even uses a fucking auto-tuner?! What the hell is going on? I guess when you need money, you need money. He performed at this year's Grammys awards with the teenagers.

If only Stevie could see how this performance makes him look.

Hit the jump for a video of the performance.

We were raised on Stevie Wonder and his music," added Kevin. "We were blown away. To be at the Grammys for the first time performing with Stevie Wonder was awesome."

Sure you did kid.

Not sure how long Youtube will be hosting this since all the other ones have been taken down.
Hit for around 3:10 to lose all hope.


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