Joaquin Phoenix, A Rapper Off His Fucking Rocker

Joaquin Phoenix joined the ranks of Joan Crawford and Marlon Brando in the Hall of Batshit Crazy Actors when he showed up on Letterman in a state that can only be described as a level above completely catatonic. The only difference is, Crawford and Brando went nuts at the end of their careers, not smack-dab in the fucking middle of them. Video of the interview after the hyper, loosely translated as JESUS CHRIST YOU HAVE TO WATCH THE INTERVIEW.

The notable Roman sister-fucker and Cash impersonator quit his acting career late last year to pursue one in hip-hop. While some would say this idea was eccentric, it doesn't help that he's filming it all while taking himself entirely too seriously. Rap, in itself, is not a particularly serious medium of music -- and hobo beards and sunglasses don't lend themselves to the genre, either. Because I know the world only exists in black and white, I've whittled it down to only two conclusions, as I so often do.

1.) He knows exactly what he's doing, and he's going to have the last laugh when he finally reveals that he never expected anyone to take his grifter ass seriously. He's making a documentary about it, and he's a method actor, so why would he break character when he's going Mickey Rourke on the world? Would Borat break character just because somebody threatened to call the cops on him? No. He'd just thumbs up and try to fellate the female officer while she handcuffed him. Andy Kaufman did it, so I see no reason Phoenix wouldn't try.

2.) He's fucking nuts. I'm thinking maybe the death of his brother is barely hitting him, and this is his way of lashing out.

There are two sides to this coin, but the first side is definitely a lot heavier (that means I think he's a fucking loon.)